In Honor of My Dad

as i read the post before this for some reason it makes me smile,

i would rather have all of those changes happen over and over.

bargaining, another stage of grief.

tomorrow it will be four weeks 

in four days it will be 'one month'

i could make note of millstones all day,

but is there a point in that,

  every day i think of him just as much as the day before.

on the 16th August my Dad road his 'dirt bike' up to Heaven.

i still don't believe it.

it was a 'deceivably sharp corner'

no one really knows what happened, 

but we know he would have died instantly.

in my head i know he would have felt no pain, 

in my heart i know my God would have taken him before his body was impacted in any way.

God knew this was his appointment with death.

i only have peace because of my simple faith that God, and Heaven, ARE real.   

if you don't believe that, fine

i know that it is extremely hard to grasp because unless you physically feel the power of the Gods holy spirit, 

then of course you don't believe it.

i know there is a spiritual world, good and bad. 

growing up around people who know the good side helps, 

but i did not know this spirit - or have this faith- until i FELT what i now know as 'God'.

faith, when i speak to God - he listens. 

having a Levi helps when grieving for he has a shoulder i can cry into,

BUT

God makes loosing Dad bearable.

God gives me Peace, 

when all my thoughts think of all the bad things - God reminds me of the positive things.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" 

good old John 3:16, who would have thought,

one of the only scriptures i learnt as a child that still sticks.

i was about to land back in Nelson,

i was crying all over Levi, telling God i don't want to believe it.

just rambling prayers of grief- like i had been the last 24ish hours since we had found out.

then in the back of my head which sounded like a memory, i hear

 "You don't have to believe it Kirsty, but it is real, because he's sitting right beside me"

then silence 

John 3:16 flashed though my brain,

my heart felt warm

my head all of a sudden felt peace

i didn't stop crying but i knew... 

i knew God had just given me what i needed to get though this.

because of faith God i know i see things differently.

if i had no God I'm not sure id be coping with this.

this is why i have faith, life changes all the time

its how we deal with different situation that make us who we are.

everyone is worthy of God.

just ask him.

The two weeks i was in Nelson with the family were full of miracles and food.

Thank You!!!

 to everyone who made something or brought us flowers,

who came to visit or wrote me Facebook messages, emails and txts.

thank you for simple words which warmed my heart.

reading message from friends and people i hardly talk to is so therapeutic

i mostly had/have no words to respond with,

but don't think i didn't read every email/txt/message twice.

Ian McIntyre

 Dad

God gave him a dream. 

i believe it was to work with people in a place others wouldn't want to.

as long as I've known he wanted to retire in a third world country and work/live with the locals.
when he wasn't working he raved about riding his bike and going on off road trips with his mates, boy time.

He was working for Asian Outreach developing a training facility for local people. 

you can find out more here or here or on Facebook here .

He had just finished the workshop which is where the practical training will take place. 

A venue i plan to visit in the next year with the family and who ever else want to come. 

someone said the amount of work Dad and his local apprentices achieved in Steng Treng was amazing.

it doesn't surprise me, 

i know my dad and he was the VERY productive 'do-er' type.

he couldn't stay still... I'm the same.

of course i am more than proud of my Dad. 

and i told him all the time. 

he will always be the best Dad and my longest standing male role model.

oxo

kj